Why do we feel the need to put a number on it
My age is all the things I’ve learnt along the way
I rarely think about my age now. I’ve passed some of the traditional milestones and opted out of others. It’s only in conversation with others that my attention is drawn to the passing of time and the numbers that serve to count the years I’ve existed.
I’ve been thinking about time and memories a little bit this week. It’s my birthday and I always start to think about all the things I’ve done with my time up until this point. Sometimes I would mark the passing of time in memories, a collection of invites, tickets and programs, the proof that it all happened. But what I’ve done more recently is collect the thing’s I’ve learnt along the way.
So I thought I would share some of the things I’ve come to realise and those I plan to take with me into the next year. And I’d love it if you shared some of the things you’ve learnt in the comments.
A few things I’ve figured out along the way…
Know what really matters to you and always make decisions based on those values
Keeps boundaries with ferocity. When you give in once people will keep expecting it of you
Make yourself and your own happiness a priority
Stay true to your own version of success and keep on your own path. Following someone else’s will only lead you somewhere you don’t really want to be
Question the big thoughts. Is this what you really think and feel or what you think you should think and feel?
When you realise you don’t have to meet societies expectations of you, you discover there were so many traditional life decisions that don’t really matter anymore either
Don’t be afraid to do the things no one else is doing. If you look closer you will find your people
There is not only one way to live a life. If you can’t see the a path, make one. There will be people coming after you that will be glad you did
Slow down. Action following a moment of calm is always better than rushing into something
There is no such thing as wasting time. We are not here to be productive
Remember what you loved as a child and never stop doing it. There is always time
Grow things (both in the garden and otherwise) If they don’t work out there is always another chance to get it right
Travel alone. There is something both freeing and rebellious about eating alone and something mildly amusing about the confusion on the face of the staff when you ask for a table for one
Follow your curiosity. You never know where that thread will lead you, today, tomorrow, years from now
Read. Read widely and deeply and from as many different perspectives and experiences
Be an ally if you can. It’s always better to speak up than to stay silent
Fight battles that are not your sparingly. You don’t need to be the voice of everyone all the time
Adopt the mindset of ‘I’m not here to win, I’m here to contribute’ and let go of always needing to be right
Quitting is not a bad thing. There is courage in knowing when to stop or when to leave a situation
Your job does not define you. It’s a part of life not all of it
Money and power are a wonderful illusion of success, but when you really uncover what matters most it rarely includes these two things
Once you let go of ego you can enjoy where you are. This is happiness
Create a life you don’t need a holiday from. The holidays will seem all the sweeter when you are still excited to return to life afterwards
There is a beauty in the ordinary. The everyday things are worth stopping to be in, not just the big moments as these are few and far between
These are the things I know right now in this moment. They may change or evolve and for sure some new ones will be added but this is what the years have taught me. The number will never tell the story of my life, it’s all the things I’ve learnt along the way that make me.
What’s something you’ve learnt that’s changed the way you see the world? If you feel like you want to, I’d love you to share your wisdom with me in the comments.
Thank you for these. I'm in my early (dare I say "mid") 30s and feeling and learning my way to some of these points.
I love this list! “Create a life you don’t need a holiday from. The holidays will seem all the sweeter when you are still excited to return to life afterwards” is my favourite.
I’m going to keep coming back to this list for inspiration and have saved your post. Thank you!